Ha! I've finally got things tidy.

Everyone who starts a blog always intends that 1,000'a of people will log in and read it, hang off every word and probably it'll by some method bring some cash in.

The secret it doing it regularly and having interesting content this much I do know.

I've fallen at the regular content part but I guess anyone who comes to visit us would understand why.

Moving to a smallholding has been a baptism in hell fire for many different reasons. I sit typing this up, with a can of fruit strongbow to my right and a tidy room surrounding me. That latter part has been a big issue for me for a number of years. I know some people can get on with things, stay organised and not care if the room around them or the outside space devolves into chaos, but it bothers me. Somewhere in the recess of my brain it eats away bugging me. Putting the walls up to basic admin, regular updates of websites and chatting about what mundane jobs I've been involved with. Running the business has been a touch boom and bust and I certainly don't mind admitting to that. One minute I'm on top of the emails and enquiries, next minute I'm simply struggling to keep the soap kitchen tidy between orders and making the soaps.

Some of that has certainly been down to infrastructure. It's been a slog to create a home, a smallholding and a business all on one site. I don't mind what the blogging gives to me. I want to chat and share what we have created here. I'm sure there are more people out there who love gardening as much as me, love growing vegetables & fruit. Like to have animals, livestock, love to craft, be creative and frankly just love life.

What has got me thinking more in the last few days is that a friend and ex-colleague passed away on Friday. Cancer took him at the age of 40. A year younger than me. If something like that doesn't get you thinking I don't think much would. I'd watched him deal with the disease over the last two years and what will always stay with me was his constant need to smile and be positive. Now I don't for a second always think he held that mindset constantly. I'm sure there were tears and moments of anger, however he didn't loose sight of the enjoyment of life. He passes leaving a very important message to us all. You get out what you put in. He enjoyed life, he laughed and had fun and thats what he had however may years he was denied.

So for us..... We've sunk so much blood sweat a tears into our home that it's about time we focused on us and that we sink back to enjoy what we have created, his passing brought that quickly to the front of our minds. Is it perfect? No. Cody the dog is still digging up the back yard, and I don't think I can stop him. The weeds have come out in full force and the slugs took many of my dahlias. It won't stop me enjoying the gardens. I still see projects ahead of me, years of tweaking the gardens, planting new things. One year I'll be able to keep on top of the grass cutting, it wasn't this year so far but I'm close. Another year I'll have bumper crops from the vegetable garden, this year not. I imagine 7am walks checking plants, pulling a few weeds while I muse the space with my morning cup of tea. That isn't this year.

We've enjoyed ourselves so much so far but even we have got lost in the list of jobs that needs doing and we forgot to enjoy ourselves. Steven started a 7 week course which took all his energy to pass and I got Covid... Lucky me. So last Friday saw us stop... And I mean that. The daily jobs happened, the milking was done and the BBQ went on daily. I'm going to enjoy every tree we have planted that is alive and not worry about the ones that died or the plants that got chewed by slugs. I'm going to enjoy the flowers that we do have and think about the ones that never were.

After the weekend I'll be able to keep to a regular schedule. Steven will be possibly starting a new job with a more regular set of days and that in turn helps me out. I can plan just that little bit more easily.

So regular blogs? Maybe regular videos of me on a Facebook group or instagram feed? So many ideas and so many ways to keep sharing this beautiful place. What I have done is finally finishing decorating the house. Its clean and tidy and organised, its bright, colourful and pleases me to come sit at a clean desk, so perhaps now I can do this more regular. I'll be able to chat about the animals, the gardens and share my successes, my stresses and the joys of living this lifestyle. We are really pleased we do and glad despite all the stress we went for it.

Have we got all this figured out? No, absolutely not but then no one ever really does. I'm off to enjoy the sunset, put the BBQ on and finish my cider.


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